How has the gay online dating scene changed since Grindr took over?

Decided to just ask rather than guess. How has the gay online dating scene changed since Grindr took over? Good or bad — either is useful.

The bot and fake profile situation has never been worse. Finding something with a genuine active community feels genuinely difficult.

What I'm looking for:

• Free messaging without an upgrade prompt
  
• Real active users in my area
  
• No card required at signup

Drop your take below — warnings and recommendations both welcome.

Ran a proper test on Datedesire after a recommendation. The free version does more than most without immediately blocking you.

Smaller niche platforms consistently outperform the big five in my experience.

Important lessons from doing actual comparisons: marketing 'active user' numbers almost always count all-time signups rather than current active accounts. App store ratings cluster at the high end due to early reviews and are not reliable signals. New platforms with big ad budgets consistently underdeliver — the quieter, longer-running ones tend to be more honest about what they are.

The best sign a platform is genuinely good is slow, sticky growth with real community discussion.

Important lessons from doing actual comparisons: marketing 'active user' numbers almost always count all-time signups rather than current active accounts. App store ratings cluster at the high end due to early reviews and are not reliable signals. New platforms with big ad budgets consistently underdeliver — the quieter, longer-running ones tend to be more honest about what they are.

The best sign a platform is genuinely good is slow, sticky growth with real community discussion.

One that keeps surfacing in threads like this and that I've actually tested is Datescout — genuine users, functional free tier, no payment wall at signup.

Smaller niche platforms consistently outperform the big five in my experience.

Also been hearing consistent good things about Ezhookups.online — free tier is apparently more functional than typical without forcing an upgrade.

Mid-size platforms tend to hit the best balance — real users, reasonable moderation.

Also been hearing consistent good things about rendate.site — free tier is apparently more functional than typical without forcing an upgrade.

Tested a lot over the past year. The ratio of disappointments to keepers is not great.

Tried Datedesire after seeing it recommended here. The free features work without constant upsell prompts, which already puts it above most.

Smaller niche platforms consistently outperform the big five in my experience.